So you’re tired of your real world friends judging you, your family commenting on your edgy Facebook status’s and guys not noticing you at bars?
Become a Twitter Slut.
It’s easy, put up an AVI like this one.
Now you’re half way there. Guys will follow just about anything with tits. Ready for part 2? The Twitter name & back story…..
Go with something like like “Sassy Sucker” or something about the massive daddy issues you have or the type of submissive sex you like. Trust me, it’s cat nip to these pussy chasing one armed Twitter lurkers (one armed….get it? Cause one arm is on the keyboard and one arm is on his…..yup)
About: My daddy taught me that naughty girls have all the fun - Again, Twitter Slut Gold.
Now you need some Twitpics like these help you seal the deal that you’re bored and all you do is take Instagram photos of how bored and hot your are.
Twitter Slut Rule #6 - Always post a photo and ask a question as if your seriously low self esteem can’t get any lower like “I sent these to my ex boyfriend and he said I needed to lose 20 pounds, what do you guys think?’ - GOLD!
Or this one:
“This photo basically sums up everything that turns me on, omg i’m such a dirty slut” See what we did there, we said “Slut!” Gold! I’m telling you Twitter Gold!
Then start tweeting some of these gems:
“I’m in a “make-out-with-everyone-in-sight” kinda mood tonight”
“Just walked by a building and realized I’ve had sex in 8 different apartments”
“Got my nails done, waxed and hair blown out….Plans cancelled! No way I’m not letting someone fuck this tonight.”
“Is Triple Anal too much?”
I’m telling you, you’ll have millions of followers in no time cause Sluts always win all the time. It’s the truth and you know it. So go be a slut in real life or just on Twitter. Be safe and always wear a slut sleeve!
Have a favorite Twitter slut? Leave it in the comments section and happy slutting!